Is it OK to make use of my dead neighbour’s bins?
For years, my neighbour and I used each other’s bins when our own were full. Sadly, he passed away recently and the house is now empty. I’m still putting his bins out each week so his house looks occupied. Is it OK to make use of his empty bins?
S.M., East Keilor, VIC
It must be really creepy for all the other neighbours, seeing a dead man’s bins mysteriously going in and out each week. They may be wondering if his ghost has returned but, instead of haunting his enemies or revealing the secrets of the afterlife, he’s just trying to squeeze every last dollar out of his final quarterly council rates instalment.
I’m sorry to hear your bin-buddy has passed away. Sounds like you had a really special relationship: you lived side by side, you looked after each other, you put out once a week – it was practically a marriage.
So because you had such a successful, long-term rubbish-marriage, you’ve now, effectively, become his bin-widow, what’s known as a “solo Sulo”. Which is why I’m sure he’d be honoured if you kept his memory alive by using his empty bins: putting your grass clippings in his green bin, your excess recyclables in his yellow one, your rotting, reeking prawn-heads in his red bin because you don’t want to put them in your own.
And every garbage night, as you drag his bins out to the nature strip, think of him fondly, remembering what you had. If the moment takes you, you could even softly sing your own poignant version of Bette Midler’s Wind Beneath My Wings:
“Did you ever know you were my hero? / You opened your lids and let me in / I can fly higher than an eagle / For you were the wheels beneath my bin.”
Read more from Modern Guru:
How to avoid having dinner with the most boring man in Sydney?
What to bring to a living wake?
A taxi copped a fine after I said I was late. Should I pay up?
To read more from Good Weekend magazine, visit our page at The Sydney Morning Herald, The Age and Brisbane Times.
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Danny Katz is a columnist for The Age and The Sydney Morning Herald. He writes the Modern Guru column in the Good Weekend magazine. He is also the author of the books Spit the Dummy, Dork Geek Jew and the Little Lunch series for kids.