How can I avoid watching same-sex love scenes on TV?

I’m tired of investing time in a movie or TV series only to discover halfway through that there are non-heterosexual kissing and sex scenes, which I do not enjoy. Should there be classification warnings so I can avoid them?
L.B., Curl Curl, NSW

Nope, just get used to it. This is the new and improved movie and TV world with a powerful LGBTQI+ formula designed to take on the toughest, most baked-on homophobes. That means there’s going to be more same-sex kissing, plenty of same-sex hugging and so much same-sex lovemaking that old-fashioned, hetero sex scenes are going to start looking shocking; you’ll be sitting in front of the TV, thinking, “Hang on, one of them has breasts ... one doesn’t ... weeeeeird. And kinda gross.”

And not just sex scenes. Films and TV shows have finally started stepping up and truly reflecting our modern times with a whole variety of races, religions, identities and neurodiversities being represented – and that’s a good thing. For too long, the only people of colour on Australian TV were sun-bronzed lifesavers or Italian puppets with a Dolmio grin. For too long, only men drove cars in TV car ads, with women either sitting in the passenger seat or perving at the car as it drove past like they wanted to have sex with it. For too long, neurodivergent characters were played by non-neurodivergent actors with their hair parted down the middle, their top button done up, and given the nickname “Goober”.

Thankfully, our new cultural landscape is richer and better and we don’t need any classification warnings saying: “Contains coarse language, mature content, multicultural themes, non-white people, non-Christians, equal-gender situations and sexually diverse lovemaking scenes that may involve stubble grinding against stubble, both on the face and, sometimes, nowhere near it.”

guru@goodweekend.com.au

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