This fashion designer’s prerequisite for marriage? A dynamic like her parents

Emily Nolan is a fashion designer who is best known for twice being a finalist in the David Jones National Designer Award. The 29-year-old shares why she didn’t know her dad’s real name until she was 10, the reason she won’t date a chef again and her prerequisite for marriage.

My maternal poppa, Ian, passed away when I was four years old. I vividly recall his smell; he was a heavy smoker. I have his old books, which smell like his cigars. Poppa had a turbulent relationship with Mum. He was an incredibly charming and gorgeous man who lost his father very young. Mum said he softened a lot when I was born.

We call my paternal grandpa, Michael, who is 92, Markle. He is the spitting image of KFC founder Colonel Sanders; in our family photos, my dad, Mark, crops in a bucket of chicken to be funny. Grandpa is a mad Richmond supporter. Football means it’s a family catch-up when we go to the MCG.

I didn’t know Dad’s first name was Mark until I was 10 because Mum always referred to him as “Nolsie”. Dad has had a stutter my entire life. I don’t tend to notice it because it’s how it’s always been, but it’s more obvious when he gets emotional. Every time he goes to speak, he has to think of three different ways he will finish a sentence.

I was an undiagnosed ADHD teenager, a total ratbag. Dad’s way of helping me was by taking me on
a drive; he said hard conversations were easier to talk about when you were looking ahead. He was the great leveller in the family and never afraid to cry in front of us.

My dad is best friends with G Flip’s dad, Marc Flipo. They have known each other since they were kids. Seeing how happy Dad is with Marc is wonderful. When Dad met my Mum, he was living with Marc, who gave him some money to take her out on a date.

My brother, James, is three years younger than me. He lives in London and is a self-taught film director and producer. He left home at 18 and travelled the world, doing community work like building schools in India.

I was a late bloomer and had my first kiss at 15 with braces on. It happened during a game of Truth or Dare in a spa at a friend’s house. I thought it was awful and didn’t kiss anybody again until my first boyfriend, Harry, at 16.

Harry and I dated for two years until I was 18. His family relocated to Perth and I felt like my life was over. We would sit on Skype and talk every night. He was the first person who told me he loved me. He looked a lot like my celebrity crush, Leonardo DiCaprio.

I then dated a guy called Nick for awhile. It felt most like a relationship because we were both in the same city and could see one another all the time.

At 21, I was at a pub in Fitzroy when out pokes a head from the kitchen: Harry! We dated again until I was 23 and lived in a share house where everyone worked in hospitality; that’s when I learned to never date a chef!

I was working for a tailor and not in a good place. I didn’t want to make suits for men any more and quit. I was heartbroken and decided to start my own namesake business. That’s when Louis came into my life. I don’t know if we were in love, but he was what I needed: a caring and thoughtful man.

Louis taught me about trust and reassured me that people are good. At the core, we were best mates – and rather than a full-blown romance, we supported one another while starting our own businesses. We dated for three years until I turned 27.

I met Caleb on the night of my birthday last year and had a three-month fling. We spent every night together, texted all day; it felt like I was 16 again. I was completely smitten.

I would love to get married one day and have kids, but not with somebody who doesn’t have the same dynamic as my parents. If that means I don’t have children because I don’t meet someone who is worth it, then that’s that, I guess.

The E NOLAN Ready to Wear collection is out now.

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